It started out lovely. There was nothing and no one coming in between your group of friends. And then something happened--someone got married, pregnant, moved away, began their career, added new people to the mix and the magic dissolved.
By: Ashley Charisma, Author of School of Black Love, the novel
www.ashleycharisma.com
(Baltimore - July 5, 2009)- People used to tell me this all of the time--your group of friends won't last forever. What? Not us! We are tighter than tight. We keep our (girls/guys) night sacred! Sounds familiar? If it does, you're not the only person who has ever felt like that.
It started out lovely. There was nothing and no one coming in between your group of friends. And then something happened--someone got married, pregnant, moved away, began their career, added new people to the mix and the magic dissolved.
Now you get updates from some of your closest friends through Facebook/Myspace or even worse--other friends. Are you feeling left out or weirded out by the situation?
It's normal. I've looked through tons of photos over the years and have asked myself, what happened to her or him? I've talked to several friends and found myself thinking--geesh how did I forget to tell them something as major as a job promotion?
When did I become so private or rather so removed from that friendship that including them didn't seem that important anymore?
I've realized that like relationships between lovers, friends also can outgrow each other. It doesn't mean that you don't love them as much, but it definitely shows that times have changed between the two of you.
Maybe we like different things now, maybe you hang out a lot and I hang-in more often. Maybe I've grown tired of you telling my business to the rest of our friends, or your lying about hanging out and just not wanting to hang out with me. Maybe I want to see the world and you just want to see the same neighborhood.
Whatever your "maybe" may be--its ok to accept that this is a natural part of life. You have two options--accept it and move forward or work on getting back what you lost. Like relationships, friendships take work, patience and effort. If you aren't putting those three into your friendships, chances are--you've outgrown it.
It happens.
My take--get out and enjoy the beauty in life and find new people to bond with. The magic of friendships is just waiting for you to try it!
What about you? Have you lost friendships that you never imagined? Tell me about it?